Discussions about the brain drain and its consequences on the society are making rounds. Yet, there is little discussion about the reversal effect. I personify the struggles and difficulties on return to one’s native country. Cindy Ross, a hiker cum writer says, “Returning home is the most difficult part of long-distance hiking; you have grown outside the puzzle and your piece no longer fits”. This is true as it calls for a lot of perseverance to return to motherland and reassemble after one is accustomed to living abroad.

I returned home from the United Kingdom for good after many years. Everybody kept asking me, “Why did you return?” “Was there no future over there?” “Didn’t you find a decent job?” It is sad that people believe any Nepali coming back must not have found a job overseas. Coming home during vacations is usually relaxing, with visits to beautiful places and quality time with near and dear ones. But it is hard to answer the queries people posed to those who return home permanently. The struggle can be psychologically challenging. I still remember one of my friends telling me, “To survive here, you need two things: patience and a good sense of humor.” 

The preparation for assimilation started a year earlier as I searched for good schools for my kids. I did not want them to miss the better standard of education they had abroad. I was astonished to find the amount of foreign named schools and colleges boasting to provide excellent education. Most of the schools focused mainly on the percentage secured in exams, rather than on holistic development of a child. Similarly, the blooming of medical colleges and hospitals with research center tag in every nook and corner made me wonder whether there are any proper rules and regulations.

For a prosperous family, it is easy to resettle as things are already prepared for the homecoming. However, for a middle class family, starting from looking for a place to stay to education for kids to search for a decent job, it is a nightmare. I have met a lot of people who had to return when nothing worked out. Is it simply luxury that we seek when we come back? Luxury for Nepalis is electricity, water, and proper roads. Unfortunately we do not have these and the creative minds, which could be used in constructive work, are being wasted in meeting these basic necessities. Isn’t it the government’s responsibility to provide elementary rights to its citizens?

“You’ve lost years of competition,” colleagues told me. As a rule, we tend to become junior to the rest of the group. We are regarded as a threat sometimes, when we try to implement better ideas learned abroad as alternative to traditional ways. Not to forget that we have a background of good academic qualification and experiences of working in developed countries which we can execute in our budding set ups. 

I remember one of my colleagues, who, in spite of his highest education degree and qualifications and working experiences in the UK to match, had to sit for an exam with junior colleagues to prove he is qualified at the basic level. Isn’t it an utter humiliation for him? Who will look into these matters? Lawmakers are simply worried that people with permanent residency abroad receive opportunities in two countries. But what about those who have returned for the love for the motherland and the family by sacrificing luxuries?

The amount of frustration for us returnees cannot be explained. Whether it is private sector or the government, work ethics is probably unheard of in Nepal. Work-related politics causes frustration, kills creative energy and decreases morale. But the concept of work culture is slowly changing as the east is adopting western values. Unless the older generations share their responsibilities with young and inspire the society, our future is grim.

Over the last decade, I have found many positive changes in our country that I feel proud of. The implementation of anti-drunk driving has noticeably decreased the rate of life threatening accidents and improved the amount of quality time people spend with their families. The widening of roads has lessened traffic congestion and the city looks better than before. Vibrant graffiti art has brought colorful life to Kathmandu streets.

It is indeed nice to be back to the nest of smiles, helping hands, familiar aroma of foods and comfortable surroundings, and ultimately the satisfaction I get by serving my people is something I greatly treasure. However, when you can’t support your family, when deranged work ethics torments you, when people try to demoralize you, the regret of return becomes a norm. It is really frustrating to constantly try to modify the system. But however much we try, it slowly changes us instead.

Vasudhaiva Kutumbakam is a Sanskrit phrase which means that the whole world is a single family. Therefore, we can settle anywhere in the world as home is where our heart is. However I feel our heart remains in the motherland, surrounded with our parents, family members and friends. There are many like me who made their journey back home and are helping break the so-called brain drain. It would be terrible for the country if there are no proper ways to retain people like us. 

Published on: 21 June 2014 | The Kathmandu Post